Happy Halloween!

I have heard the sign of an intelligent person is learning from past mistakes. Unfortunately, I have been less than intelligent over the past week.

Who uses a parking break? Apparently most people in Hungary. I first learned this when my coworker Edina drove my car this summer, and the car started smoking and screeching when I drove it home later that night with the parking break unknowingly activated. Oops. It happened again this week, but at least I knew what the smell of burning tires meant.

Step aerobics class. I tried a step class once in Boston and walked out after five minutes. I fully support most aerobics classes (some are friggin’ hard!) but am not crazy about simultaneously hopping over a step and memorizing a dance routine while being surrounded by coordinated, graceful women (although in Boston there was always the token gay guy). While incredibly alluring outside of the gym, my go-to shoulder roll wins me no points in step class. However, when my coordinated, graceful coworker Csilla asked me to attend a step class with her on Wednesday, my brain replaced past experience with desire to make a friend. This was not smart. Taking an advanced step class in Hungarian might have been my most negative experience since moving here. I would tell you more about, but literally I start twitching when I think about it.

My commute. With no traffic, my commute to work takes 13 minutes. However, I refuse to accept that there is and always will be traffic and leave my apartment exactly 13 minutes before I need to be a work. Understandably, this often creates problems. In a related note, I will be asking for books on tape for Christmas this year. Preferably something uplifting to dull the pain of being a well-paid excel and powerpoint monkey.

HBS website. According to the HBS website, HBS has been sending out first round interview invitations for the past two weeks. This was not an issue in my life until I logged onto the website on Thursday and learned this. After the initial freak-out (I have not received an interview), I decided for my own good I should stay off the site to avoid stressing and the resulting range of emotions.

So, HBS doesn’t want me? What is wrong with me?
Whatever – too bad for them. I’ll just go somewhere else and kick ass there. Somewhere else like…shit, that means I need to apply somewhere else.
&%?$#@

In a related note, I visited the website for the last time one hour ago.

In retrospect, after reading my entry, maybe no business school should accept me.

Happy Halloween! I just found the one Halloween party tonight in Budapest and I will be in attendance along with my turkey baster!

Hungarian Name or Unit of Measure?

1. Nimrod
2. Nibble
3. Ferenc
4. Jansky
5. Garn
6. Nandor
7. Attoparsec
8. Zeteny
9. Janka
10. Sydharb
11. Virag

Top 100 Hungarian Baby Names: 1,3,6,8,9,11
Unit of Measure: 2,4,5,7,10

________

Poll Answer: All of 'em are Hungarian. For those of you familiar with Adam Sandler's Chanukah song, I hope you realize that Paul Newman's half Jewish, Goldie Hawn's half too. Put them together, what a fine-looking Jew!

It's Not That I'm Lazy; It's That I Just Don't Care

I attended a “Top 50” management meeting this week (the fact that I actually don’t manage anyone is I guess a moot point). The meeting was held CEE (Central / Eastern European)-style, meaning we spent three days in an isolated castle in Bohemia. Because the company is suffering from poor morale due to the recent restructuring and “headcount reductions,” we spent half of Thursday discussing and brainstorming solutions to address key areas of employee discontent.

Employee issues seemed to boil down to lack of communication. Lack of communication between top and middle management. Lack of communication between middle management and “the bottom.” Lack of communication among the country business units.

(How can you hear the terms “middle” or “top management” and not think of Office Space…I'd like to move us right along to a Peter Gibbons. Now we had a chance to meet this young man, and boy that's just a straight shooter with upper management written all over him.)

I will not bore you with specifics because frankly I am sick of the topic and do not want to get fired if someone from work reads my blog. But I did think it was interesting that the consultant hired to run the session encouraged that all communication be done using “offshore English.” The consultant defined offshore English as “language devoid of slang, idioms, sarcasm or humor.” Basically it is like reading the Dartmouth Review.

Upon moving to Hungary, I quickly learned sarcasm is not easily translatable. This is a typical conversation I used to have.

Me: Hi, my name is Alex Bochicchio.
Co-worker: You have a boy’s name! Hello, I am Gabor.
Me: It’s nice to meet you. What nice weather we are having! (Weather is my default topic. If I start talking to you about the weather, chances are we have nothing to talk about.)
Co-worker: Yes. Your name is so long with so many letters.
Me: Yes it is! It took me years to learn how to spell it.
Co-worker: You do not know how to spell your name?

So I understand that standardized English should be used in a workplace with mostly non-native English speakers. But that is no fun because it is difficult to express your personality using sterilized language.

I have been frustrated with my lack of and superficial relationships with coworkers and perhaps this is why. In the US, I often communicated through subtle sarcasm (although honestly often I was the only one who was amused), and I cannot do that here. I subconsciously translate my thoughts into sentences which can be communicated to non-native speakers or I run the risk of being misunderstood or appearing unable to spell my name.

And I am the native English speaker. I am sure my communications problems pale in comparison to non-native speakers.

No wonder Europeans believe so strongly in the social lubrication known as alcohol.

A Guide to Dining-Out in Hungary

1. Do not order the vegetarian option. Hungarians are carnivores and generally skeptical of anyone who is not. Consequently do not order the vegetarian dish because the restaurant likely is making it for the first time. Also, when perusing the menu, note that Hungarians consider people who eat chicken and beef but not pork “vegetarians.”

2. Listen to the waiter. Hungarian food can be strange. I like almost anything (herring, bone marrow, Lucky Charms) but even I haven’t been able to stomach certain meals. When the waiter suggested that my dad not order the “poppy seed dumplings” because it was an “acquired” taste, my dad was wise to change his order.

3. Stay away from dishes named after other nationalities. This advice especially applies to the American salad (a bowl of mayonnaise accompanied with julienned vegetables) and Spanish paella (in Hungary it apparently is acceptable to use sauerkraut as a main ingredient in paella).

4. Order exotic meat dishes only at more expensive restaurants. If your venison or duck costs less than four euros and is covered in a thick cream sauce, aren’t you a little worried that you are eating cat?

5. Grilled probably means fried. Now when I order grilled “csirke” (chicken), I almost expect it to come breaded and deep fried with a side of fries. Not that I am complaining. It is like a higher power is telling me, “Silly Alex – why even try to be healthy?”

6. Don’t dismiss a restaurant just because it offers a tourist menu. Budapest understands the importance of tourists, and the best restaurants often have an English or tourist menu.

7. But do dismiss all “Kinai” or Chinese buffets. This is my third rule when visiting Budapest. Trust me.

Bochicchio Weekend

What else would we do on Saturday night other than head over to the annual Palinka and Sausage Festival at the Buda castle (not to be confused with the much more castle-like-looking Fisherman's Bastion nearby). It was pouring outside but it was probably good that we concentrated on keeping our food dry rather than on what we actually were eating.


We learned a lot about each other & our family on the trip. Aunt Ann-Marie told me Dad kept a list of every movie which opened in New York after 1964 (now I know where my list-making obsession comes from). AAM learned their father fought at Normandy. And we devised a barter system upon Dad and AAM's return to the US - Dad will give AAM the Bochicchio history book in return for the recipe for Grandma's anisette cookies (aka the original "Little Nasties").




On Sunday night, we went to the opening of Bluebeard's Castle, a one-act opera by Hungarian composer Béla Bartók. After our long opera experience in Vienna, we were happy that Wikipedia said the opera "lasts only a little over an hour."

According to Wikipedia, Bluebeard brings his new wife Judith home to his castle for the first time. Upon arriving, Judith insists that all the doors be opened to allow light to enter the gloomy castle. Bluebeard refuses, saying that they are private places not to be explored by others, and asks Judith to love him but ask no questions. Not the sharpest tool in the shed, Judith doesn't take this as a hint to bolt.

Judith gets her way and all seven doors are opened. Behind the seventh door are Bluebeard's three former wives, who are mute and dressed in heavy jewelry and black robes. Despite her protests, Judith is forced to put on the same dress and disappears behind the door. The background fades to black and the opera is over.

This is probably a comedy by Hungarian standards.


About to leave, we notice that no one else is leaving the opera house. Because I am a bad Hungarian student, I cannot read the program but can make out the word "twice." I don't want to stick around to find out what "twice" means, but Dad and AAM overrule me. We return to our seats for the second act of the reportedly one-act opera. The second act is the first act all over again. One opera. Twice.


You may think Dad & AAM look so happy because there was no "thrice" part of Bluebeard's Castle, but this picture was taken minutes after they found out the Red Sox were swept.



Overall, the only disappointment of the weekend was that we missed this:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/09/miss-plastic-hungary-2009_n_316181.html

Vienna Weekend

Pops & Aunt Anne-Marie. Dad got a chance to practice his German. He did not refer to himself as a jelly donut.


We visited both the Schonbrunn (summer) and Hofburg (winter) palaces and toured Empress Elisabeth's private rooms. Elisabeth was renowned beauty and dedicated the majority of the day to her ankle length hair, extensive skin routine and gymnastics exercises.


Eating sweetmeats NOT sweetbreads before The Magic Flute aka The Longest Opera.


Depending on your nationality, in Bratislava, Pressburg or Pozsony.

Dachstein, Austria

My coworkers and I went on a weekend excursion to the Alps. I thought we were going on a hiking / camping trip. We actually were going climbing.


After renting via ferrata equipment (belts & helmets) in town, we took the lift to the top of Dachstein. Please note Robert (left), organizer of the trip and experienced climber, and his expression, which pretty much translates into "what the hell have I gotten myself into?" It would have been awkward for him to explain on Monday why GTS was down five employees.


Learning how to use the equipment.


About an hour and a half later, we take a "short" break at the top of our practice climb.




Geza, what are you doing?


Unfortunately, I do not have pictures of the subsequent "real" climb.

Leaving Geza and Gabor back at the lodge, Balazs, Robert, Tunde & I began a steeper climb. 20 minutes into the trek, I realized this was totally different from the practice run. We were really high. And I am really afraid of heights. I made a deal with myself that from then on I would not look down.


This tactic worked for a while until Tunde got nervous and stopped climbing. I stopped too, and that was when I made the mistake of looking down. Good lord.


Tunde and I did not finish the second climb, but overall it was an awesome day. Especially in retrospect now that I am safely on the ground.

The best part was during the second climb a couple of climbers literally skipped over me and scurried up the mountain without clipping themselves in! Oh my god.

On Sunday, we went on a much more tame hiking trip which did not require helmets.


Not a bad way to spend the weekend.

You Get What You Ask For

I understand that a lot of the world does not have a favorable impression of the US and am fascinated by the topic of how other countries view America and Americans. That being said, I probably should not have brought up the topic with my coworkers, four Hungarians and one Slovak, in the middle of a four hour hike in the Alps this weekend.

The response I got was that America / Americans always butt in where they don't belong. I understand this sentiment and agree to a certain extent - most Americans agree Vietnam was a disaster, and the majority of Americans believe it was a mistake to invade Iraq. My response to my coworkers was that there is a gap between what the majority of informed Americans want and how the US actually acts. Obviously this is a huge problem.

Feeling compelled to defend the US at least a little bit, I then pointed out that the US "butted into" WWII and asked my coworkers if they thought the US involvement in the war was a good thing. I thought this was a rhetorical question. However the response I received was "yeah I guess it was good, but they should have gotten involved earlier."

Although you shouldn't fault someone for stating their opinion (especially when asked!), I was annoyed at how my coworkers were defending their position. So they are criticizing the US for not getting involved earlier in WWII but for becoming too involved in other conflicts? That seems like a specious argument.

Sensing my annoyance, my coworker told me that he was sorry that he shattered my illusions that America was beloved by all countries. I am naive, but I am not stupid. And the fact that he believes I think this after knowing me and having multiple discussions about this topic with me pisses me off.

I know America has and continues to f-up. But I also believe that it has done positive things for other countries. And the fact that my coworkers refuse to acknowledge this is what made me mad.

I think my coworkers see America as an easy target on which to blame the historical plight and current situation of their country. I say this because they also frequently blame the EU and other "higher powers" for their problems. This seems like a cop-out.

On the other hand, I am probably too quick to the defend the US. However, for as many faulty "illusions" I have about the US, it seems fair that that other countries also reevaluate their "illusions" about the US as they may be based on similarly faulty arguments.

Why Today is Great

1. I now have an automatic garage door opener. Upon giving it to me, the receptionist commented "how modern" our building was.

2. Do you remember Codi's "tackys" outfit in college - the one-piece jean jumpsuit? My coworker wore that today.

3. I made trail mix for this weekend's hike in memory of the Dartmouth swim team's annual hike to Mt. Cardigan and m&m game.

4. My sister Kara wrote a blog entry which basically calls artists egotistical narcissists. Haha.

http://karasartcart.blogspot.com/

(second entry down)

Let’s Have a History Lesson!

I started and then stopped a blog entry when I went to Bratislava last week. Since then I completely have lost my train of thought. Thus, the list format once again.

I.

Poland always has had a good relationship with the US – more so than other countries in the region. Polish special forces took part in the 2003 invasion of Iraq, making it one of only three US allies to take part in the initial fighting. Poland was also one of the earliest and biggest contributors to the fight in Afghanistan, with 1,600 soldiers.

However, the Poles are increasingly worried about Obama’s “conciliatory” foreign policy towards Russia. They view Russia as a massive, irrational threat to the region, as evidenced by Russia shutting off its oil pipeline through Ukraine during a cold spell last winter. The pipeline supplies 1/5 of the natural gas consumed in Europe.

Obama recently announced his decision to withdraw from plans to build a missile defense system in Czech and Poland, a plan which Russia had strongly opposed. And unfortunately, Obama made the announcement on September 18th, the 70th anniversary of the Russian invasion of Poland. Whether or not Obama made the right decision, Obama and the US are severely declining in popularity in Poland.

II.

In Bratislava, I stayed at a “boutique” hotel with cool art and chocolates in the rooms (yeah, it doesn’t take much). However, the best thing about the hotel was that you could request a “lady’s chamber” - a small room which looked like a dollhouse, with a slanted ceiling and dormer windows. I stayed in a big-girl room on this trip, but maybe next time.

III.

There has been tension between the Hungarians and Slovaks since Hungary was stripped of most of its land after WWI. And relations recently have become “frostier” according to the Budapest Times. This summer Slovaks passed a law making it illegal to use Hungarian or “incorrect Slovak” in public places. This may not have been a huge deal, but hundreds of thousands of Hungarians live and run businesses in Southern Slovakia. In retaliation, the Hungarian Minister of Foreign affairs recently was quoted referring to Slovakia as a “younger brother that needs to be taught European manners.” Snap!

IV.

I have mentioned before the pull-over-happy crazy traffic cops and their penchant for bribery – whether it be in the form of cash or cake. I was driving with my boss Gerry to the hotel, and a cop stopped us right before we were about to drive over a bridge. Gerry and the cop then proceeded to have a standoff: the cop browsed Gerry’s (Irish) passport and twirled his pencil; Gerry refused to reach for his wallet. After fifteen minutes, Gerry gave up. Outcome - Slovak cop: +EUR 50; Gerry (& everyone else in the car): -15 minutes of our lives.